Just like me

This weekend I picked you up for a sister weekend, something that we have both grown to love. I said I was doing it for you, but really it was for me. Every time I am with you, you cause me to dream bigger, hope more, and see life from a different perspective – something I desperately needed this weekend. There have been many jokes made about how much you are like me but this weekend I think I saw it more than ever.

Just like me, you grabbed your bag of clothes, making sure to pack a cute outfit and shoes but somehow managed to forget your toothbrush. Despite the fact that mom tells you that your teeth will fall out if you continue to do that, I promise they won’t. And by the time you are 11 you will have grown out of the toothbrush-forgetting habit. On the rare occasion that you do forget it when traveling somewhere you will quickly realize that you can purchase one just about anywhere.

Just like me, you like to break the rules or push the envelope. You immediately hopped in the front seat of my car…like you do every time I take you somewhere…knowing that Mom and Dad always makes you sit in the back. Except this time you asked me what the law says. So I whipped out my iPhone and, sure enough, the law says that you have to be 7 years old and above 60lbs in order to sit in the front. You told me that you are almost 10 and 70lbs so I let you ride in the front seat of the car for the first time ever. And you thought you were way too cool. Not just because you were riding in the front but because you proved an adult wrong. But why should that surprise me when I was the same exact way at 9 years old.

Just like me, you love to start projects but hate to finish them. Our girls weekend was supposed to be about learning how to sew, which you did for the most part….but you only liked sewing the big things. You hated finishing up the straps on your apron or cleaning up the scraps of fabric. Honey, this is one that you’re probably going to deal with the rest of your life. And if you ever want to make something of yourself then you are going to have to suck it up and learn to finish things…or become really good at outsourcing, which is my personal recommendation.

Just like me you love to stay up late and sleep in. Your brothers are up at the crack of dawn (for reasons neither of us will ever understand) but you, well, you know the importance of that extra 15 minutes…or 3 hours…of sleep. They say this changes after puberty but if you are anything like me, you will be 27 and still enjoying every extra minute of sleep that you get.

Just like me, you wear your heart on your sleeve. Your heart will get broken a few times and you will have to fight long and hard to not let yourself get bitter, but know that it is worth the fight. Come what may, wearing your heart on your sleeve and loving well will always be worth it. Always. Broken hearts are a part of life and the experiences that you gain from loving wholeheartedly will enrich your life and make the pain worth it.

Just like me, you are adventurous. When we have sister days you always ask me to take you for sushi or Chipotle. I don’t know any 9 year olds that ask for sushi. And as for Chipotle…you put an insane amount of tabasco sauce on your rice. But all this is part of the adventurous side of you that I really love. The side that wants to try new things, explore, and learn. Don’t ever lose that.

Just like me, you are ambitious, creative and driven but will struggle through some of the basics. Mom and Dad will never understand why you still have to use your fingers to add 7+7 but can ace every one of your spelling tests. Don’t worry, by the time you are 15 years old, 7+7 will be easy and you will still be doing great at English. But don’t let that be an excuse – continue to work on those math flash cards until you have mastered them because when you finally do, you will feel like you accomplished something great and it will give you the momentum you need to complete your next great feat. Like 7×7.

Just like me, you are into boys wayyyy too early. But I really hope and pray that, just like me, you don’t actually act on it until you are in your 20’s. Trust me when I say it’s not worth it. Don’t worry about having a boyfriend until you are 25. Okkkk, so I know I sound like an old fart…maybe 21, if you are mature enough, but 25 is preferable. Until you are ready to get married, don’t worry about having a boyfriend. People may get serious with you and tell you that you need that experience of dating when you are young and…blah blah blah…but when you are in your 20’s and have traveled to at least one country for every year of your life because you weren’t tied down to a boyfriend, get serious with them and ask what their life experiences have been like. I may be looked at as weird or arrogant for this one, but I will stand by it until the day I die…and I really hope you do the same. But, most importantly, before you go off trying to find the right boy for you, find yourself first. You won’t regret it. Travel. See the world. Experience life. Live it up. Don’t let your search for Mr. Right hold you back from doing the things you want to do and going the places you want to go.

You may be just like me and, if I am to be honest, there are definitely worse people to be like. Our strengths are strong but are weaknesses are unfortunately a little too weak. So if indeed you are that much like me then take my advice on just a few things. 1.) I know you enjoy being stubborn and trying to get your own way. Use that stubbornness to fight for what is important in life, not to fight with mom or dad. 2.) Love your brothers. I know you may want to prove that you are older than them by trying to boss them around and keeping them “in their place” but doing that will only result in a long hard road of trying to restore relationships. Just love them and accept them for who they are. 3.) You are beautiful, inside and out, and don’t let anyone ever convince you otherwise. 4.) Dream, dream some more, and then push yourself to dream even bigger. And when you have done that, fight for those dreams with every ounce of energy that you have. It will be so, so worth it. 5.) Just because society tells you that you have to conform doesn’t mean that you have to. Finish school but don’t lose yourself so much in what you should be doing that you forget what you were made to do. 6.) Know that you are loved. More than any words could ever express, you are loved. I think you are pretty much the coolest person on the face of the planet and I absolutely adore you. Mom and Dad would give anything for you (and already have given so much) so even when you don’t feel loved, know that you are. But, most of all, there is a God in heaven that created you perfectly who loves you more than anything. So when you feel like all else in life is failing you – and trust me, just like me, you will feel that way at times – just know that you really are incredible. The crown of creation. Fearfully and wonderfully made. An incredible blessing to everyone who knows you.

Love,
Your *favorite* big sister

  1. Momma Candelora

    September 26th, 2011 at 8:50 pm

    ok, you have me sobbing right now!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Rachel

    September 27th, 2011 at 5:40 pm

    love this post!!

  3. Mary Marantz

    October 7th, 2011 at 8:37 am

    Love it!!

  4. Karen Stott

    October 10th, 2011 at 3:05 pm

    LOVE this Alicia… had me tearing up. xoxo

  5. Jessica Chavez

    October 10th, 2011 at 3:23 pm

    LOVE the post!! I wish I had a big sister !

  6. Maria

    October 12th, 2011 at 3:42 pm

    She’s a lucky gal to get such great advice… LOVE THIS POST!

  7. Vanessa D'Anna

    October 12th, 2011 at 9:01 pm

    Umm okay wow I’am right there with you mother on this one! What powerful words, you inspire me! I’am blessed to have you in my life. What a beautiful post made me cry!

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